We quickly realized that our little family of three...we were it. We had to figure out how to "survive" just us. With a new baby and a fairly new marriage, it was scary. There were A LOOOOT of tears, anger, and "Why?"s. There were times I wanted to quit, run away, and not look back.
Truth is, I didn't feel like I had anyone but my best friend/husband and my sweet baby. I did of course, but without me expressing my feelings (I don't do that well HA!) to anyone, no one knew we were feeling a little down and out. I was scared and I also hit "Mama Bear" mode. :) I didn't trust a soul, I didn't want to let anyone in, and I sure as hell wasn't going to reach out to anyone. I was going to protect my family from ever getting hurt again.
I have never felt very spiritually in touch with God until I met my husband. You can read a little about that HERE . The truth is, when we started going through this "funk" I wanted to be really angry at God. I quickly realized He didn't do this...someone else did. He was there to pick us up though. :) It's an amazing feeling to look at your husband and just break down in tears from anger, and his response is "Let's keep praying about it."
With this "funk" I have stepped out and tried new things I never would have fathomed a year ago. I have met new people that I definitely never would have reached out to just a few months ago.
I have met mommies, daddies, babies, and bumps that I've fallen in love with.
I have a stronger bond with my husband and sweet girl because we somehow "survived" this bump in the road. Only just a few months ago I was ready to throw in the towel and start over else where. I've done my first EVER bible study and FINISHED it. It's help me feel a bond with some amazing women and made my marriage stronger than ever.
Today I am just feeling overwhelmingly blessed and thankful, and I wanted to share. Just when I thought we couldn't get past this, I look back at how far we have come. I owe it to my precious family who bring me nothing but joy. To God who has listened to my incessant praying and relentless crazy talk. :) I owe it to you guys who leave me the sweetest comments and encouragement. You don't know how much it truly means to me!
At a time when we felt all alone, people that we barely "know" have come out and made us feel whole again. Like we can conquer anything because we have you guys and each other. So thank you. Thank you for being so awesome. :) We love you guys!
Ps. I promise not to make too many of these mushy posts. :) I just had an overwhelming feeling to get this out at this very minute!
Lots of Love,