Sometimes things happen in our lives that we never see coming. Then of course we question "HOW DID I NOT SEE THIS COMING?!!?"
We've been going through some personal things for a few weeks now in the Boff household. In turn, I have been trying to focus on the people I care about the most, which means other things take a back seat.
One thing you may not know about me is I love with ALL of my heart. It doesn't matter if you are my sister, my husband, my cousin in law, or my best friend. . . You are my family. I treat you as family, I love you as family, I hurt for you like family.
In my lifetime I have been burned by people I care about, and it takes me time to get over it. Sometimes those people come back in my life and sometimes those people I gladly let go. However, I think this saying says how I feel in that moment perfectly:
" Sometimes we expect more from others, because we would be willing to do that much for them."
I've been told many a time in my life that I let others run over me, that I'm too nice, or that I take things too personally. I can't help it. It's my personality. I don't like to be mean, hateful, rude, etc. It physically hurts me. So when people hurt me or the ones I love, it affects me greatly.
I think God gave me such empathy for a reason. I think that's what makes me a "good" nurse. I think that's why I was so scared of marriage, because I knew if something ever happened to mine. . . I would die. I hope it's what will make me a great Mom. When my sweet girl hurts or cries, I want to fix it. I want my teenage daughter to be able to come to me with something she's so terrified to tell me, but knows I will listen with an open mind and an open heart.
So sometimes I may feel angry for getting hurt at times, but I am still so grateful. I am grateful I have the family and friends that I have. They are who make me who I am. I am so thankful I have such an amazing marriage that we get through these things together. I am so incredibly blessed.
I hate writing on here "I'm ALIVE! I'm SO SORRY!" because I know you guys were just sitting on the edge of your seats, clicking refresh on your browser waiting on me to post. . . No?? :)
I just don't want to lose any of my amazing followers. I also wanted to put this down in writing. . .how I feel. This is my outlet. This makes me feel good to write.
So I'm sorry for putting you guys on the back burner, but maybe soon I'll be able to get into the groove again. Until then go love on all your sweet families. I continue to thank God for mine every second of every day.
I hope you are all doing well.
Lots of Love,